Naming your season
When I think back to my early motherhood days, I can feel myself tensing up at the thought of how new and surprising every element felt. I didn’t completely understand the season I was entering into until I was in it. Already difficult nights and days felt more challenging because I was lacking perspective and didn’t wholeheartedly believe everything would change soon enough even though my amazing support system reminded me every day.
Only now, five years later, can I look back and recognize and name the seasons I’ve experienced. My perspective has grown from talking with friends, listening to motherhood podcasts, living each day with more presence, and seeing the long-view.
Thinking of rhythms and seasons, just as Allah (swa) sends us rhythms throughout the year, we too have rhythms and seasons within our own life. The moon and stars have a rhythm that cycle through the year, affecting the tides, migrations, time, and direction.
The yearly rhythm our earth takes around the sun creates our seasonal rhythm as we see ourselves responding and changing so naturally with each new horizon.
As women, we experience rhythms within our body through the menstrual cycle. Our energy and moods can shift depending on which part of the cycle we are in. A good book on this topic is In the Flo.
Our life pulls us into new chapters and circumstances, sometimes when we least expect it. Careers can change, a new illness may impact a loved one, a new baby is welcomed into the family, conversations about relocating can come up, finding out some unexpected news, experiencing a loss, or any other seasonal shift can shake us up at any time even when our days seem ordinary overall.
Consider how these five seasons have shown up in your life. Some may of course overlap, but it’s possible for one to be predominant at a certain time. As you read through, consider:
What season are you in now?
Which season have you just passed?
Are there hints or whispers as to what may be up ahead?
How can you prepare?
No 1. – R E S T
This is a season where you are in a state of mental or physical recovery. This would be a yellow zone.
Signs:
A person may be experiencing fatigue, fogginess, and a lack of mental clarity.
What would be helpful:
Slowing down and focusing on self-care
Seeking respite
Avoiding taking on more than you can handle
Graciously accepting help and support from those you trust
What Shaytan wants of us in this season:
For us to feel lost
What Allah (swa) wants of us in this season:
To honor and care for your mind and body
No. 2 – T E S T
This is a season where a significant stressor is obvious and present, to the point where you cannot function effectively in your role(s). Things feel chaotic, out of control, or in a state of neglect. This would be a red zone.
Signs:
Higher stress levels, inability to cope in a healthy way, numbing, a sense of powerlessness, higher potential for depression, sadness, or anxiety.
What would be helpful:
Seeking support and possibly counselling
Intentional du’as and sadaqah
What Shaytan wants of us in this season:
For us to feel the test will last forever and become hopeless.
What Allah (swa) wants of us in this season:
To have patience alongside seeking helpful resources and support to guide us and get us through the testing season.
No. 3 – G I V I N G
This is a season where your support is needed for someone else. For example, you just became a new mother or welcomed a new baby into the family, or perhaps you need to help an ill family member get well. There are high demands on your time, energy, and capacity. This could be a green or yellow zone depending on the perspective.
Signs:
Someone in your life or community is counting on you in a big way to help them, support them, and hold space for them. You are needing to sacrifice your own time and comforts for the sake of someone you care about.
What would be helpful:
Staying grounded
Seeing this season as a positive weight / a positive “burden”
Having perspective on the virtues and rewards Allah will grant inshaAllah
Do what needs to be done and take care of yourself so you can be there for the one who needs you
What Shaytan wants of us in this season:
To complain and sacrifice begrudgingly
What Allah (swa) wants of us in this season:
To seek Allah’s pleasure and promised rewards by sincerely showing up for the one who needs us
No. 4 – G R O W T H
This is a season where we feel energized and passionate as we discover or work on doing and being the kind of person we’ve always imagined. We are connected to our values and acting from a place of focus and intention. This would be a green zone.
Signs:
Optimal energy levels, feeling healthy, inspired, passionate, and engaged. Core values are at the center of what you are doing each day.
What would be helpful:
Taking bold actions
What Shaytan wants of us in this season:
To get a big head, and think everything is great because we are great (becoming arrogant)
What Allah (swa) wants of us in this season:
To be humble, and attribute all the goodness we are experiencing to Him (subhanhu wata’ala)
To use our gifts in a positive and halal way
To increase our standard of giving
No. 5 – B L E S S E D
This is a season where you are making memories, starting a positive new chapter, job, life change. Or, you may be taking a much-needed break by going on Hajj, Umrah, vacations or travelling and spending time with the people you love. This would be the ultimate green zone.
Signs:
Experiencing the best of lifes’ blessings. Health, love, happiness.
What would be helpful:
Being present in every moment
Gratitude
Increasing standard of giving
What Shaytan wants of us in this season:
To think we deserve whatever blessing is being given to us by Allah (swa)
What Allah (swa) wants of us in this season:
To be ultimately grateful to Allah (swa) for His provisions
The purpose of this framework is to help us see ourselves within the seasons and rhythms in life. As you reflect on your season, consider writing what this time feels like and what you are learning and gaining from it. Of course, some seasons can overlap as I mentioned, but try to identify which one you are in predominantly so you can take the actions and have the mindset Allah (swa) would be most pleased with inshaAllah.
Till next time,
